| [031] Sunday 30 August 1980. |
[ | | August 30th, 2009
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[ WARDED TO SELF. ]
I can't do this.
Tinworth is rioting. Gaius and I haven't been able to find and kill any of the Quibbler writers. I don't understand how they can elude us like this. Most of my latest Inferi are flawed because I'm too tired to do it properly on two hours of sleep. I keep falling asleep at the post office. The only training I have time for anymore is with Bellatrix during our shifts. But I don't think we can do that anymore when we have to put down the riots now. I never have time to look after Mother anymore as much as I want to be there for her, and she's getting worse. I'm turning into my father, when he was always 'too busy' with work to look after us, and I can't accept -- 
I am failing the Dark Lord. He must have assigned all of those responsibilities to me not only because He trusted me, but also to test me and see who among us are strong enough to endure this. What if he takes all of this to mean I'm too weak to be a faithful and worthy servant and punishes me for it? I can't accept that. I'm supposed to be good at this. One of the best even, or I wouldn't have been entrusted with so many important tasks. My loyalty and devotion has never wavered. I earned my place in the hierarchy despite being the youngest after Regulus disappeared. I don't want to be told I'm a disappointment and how I'm never good enough the way Father -- |
I can do this. I'll just get an hour of sleep before the night shift in Tinworth and I will be more than ready to do this properly. I'm going to make Him proud and prove to Him and everyone else that I can be young, delicate, and not from a family like the Blacks and still be one of his best servants and better than all of them. He will acknowledge and reward me the way Father never did, even though I was his son. I can do this.
[ END WARDS. ]
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| [030] Thursday 27 August 1980. |
[ | | August 27th, 2009
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[ WARDED TO SELF. ]
Schedule for the next while until told otherwise:
- 6.00AM-2.00PM. Morning shift in Tinworth.
- 2.00PM-10.00PM. Train. Make more Inferi. Track down the Quibbler writers with Gaius. Search through mail at the post offices. Look after Mother. Eat. Sleep.
- 10.00PM-6.00AM. Night shift in Tinworth.
It's a lot of work and I hope I'll be strong enough to do it. But it's also a great honour to be entrusted with so many tasks and responsibilities to carry out for our Lord, especially as the youngest among the ranks now. And if I prove myself by succeeding at everything, then He will be proud and allow me to do even more for Him. I won't fail Him, but if I do, I'll --
I think I'm doing better lately despite my misstep earlier, so that's a good sign. Minister Nott seems pleased with the Inferi and didn't scold me for some of them still being faulty. I wonder what his reward for me will be. However, serving the Dark Lord is its own reward. I can't tell what Mr Mulciber thinks of Gaius and my lack of progress with the Quibbler writers, but at least he didn't tell me I was incompetent. I'm happy Mr Avery thought well of my asking to transfer to Tinworth for patrols. It was an unexpected extra when I'd just wanted to be able to share shifts with Bellatrix. I hope she won't mind if I follow her around. I could still learn a lot of from watching her even if she isn't my mentor anymore. [ END WARDS. ]
[ WARDED TO BELLATRIX LESTRANGE. ]
I've noticed that we'll be sharing morning and night shifts in Tinworth, Madam Lestrange. I don't wish to impose, but as sixteen hours is a lot of time and no one should be out after curfew anyway, do you think you could please tutor me in more skills only you can teach? Especially after the plans with Lupin didn't work out. And as long as the others don't know, of course. And it's completely up to you. I won't bother you again if that's what you'd prefer. [ END WARDS. ]
[ WARDED TO JULIANNE WILKES. ]
Julianne, I hate to ask you this, but are you very busy during the next while? You've probably read about the 24-hour surveillance in the newspapers already. I have to take a sixteen-hour shift from 10.00PM until 2.00PM the next day everyday to help. But while I couldn't be happier serving the Dark Lord, that leaves me with no time to keep Mother company. Winky and the Healers will look after her, of course. But I'd appreciate it and she would love it if you could have tea with her soon. Please let me know when works for you. Thank you. [ END WARDS. ]
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| [029] Tuesday 25 August 1980. |
[ | | August 26th, 2009
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[ WARDED TO IAGO MULCIBER AND GAIUS TRAVERS. ]
Mr Mulciber, Mr Travers and I went after the known Quibbler writers like you said, and this is what we have found so far:
- Xenophilius Lovegood, the editor-in-chief, wasn't at the address we got for him, but we're still looking. We also took some older copies of the Quibbler to get more names and will get onto tracking those down too.
- We went to Carlotta Pinkstone's house, but she wasn't home at the time. She also does work for a charity called the Society for the Advancement of Squibs and we've questioned the staff about her. But all they can tell us is that she handed over control to the Board of Directors last month and hasn't been heard from since then. We'll go back to her house to look for any documents that might lead us to her. And if her workers are hiding something, we'll resort to more persuasive methods to make them talk.
- There were no files or information for Tacitus Ward. When we find Lovegood, we'll torture him for his whereabouts and other facts.
We'll keep you updated as we make further progress, sir. I'm sorry we haven't -- [ END WARDS. ]
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| [028] Monday 24 August 1980. |
[ | | August 24th, 2009
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[ WARDED TO SELF. ]
I hope Minister Nott will be pleased with me again after I finish with the Inferi. Most of these are doing exactly what they've been enchanted to do on his orders. None of them have attacked me, although one did walk around in circles around me for some reason, and it's been dealt with. I'm impressed with how efficiently they tore apart that pair of Muggle tramps for one test though. It's too bad I won't be able to use their bodies to make more Inferi. But at least I know the things will attack anyone who isn't a Death Eater now.
Maybe I can use the bodies of the Quibbler writers Gaius and I are to kill to make more Inferi. It wouldn't do to let them go to waste.
I still need to see how they will react to Dark Army creatures. And check on how Demetrius and Rabastan are doing with theirs before reporting to Minister Nott. [ END WARDS. ]
[ WARDED TO SEONAG MILLIGAN AND PEGGY O'NELL. ]
Mses Milligan and O'Nell, I need your help with a project. Remember how the werewolves got to help collect bodies last week, but you had to stay behind? And the babies I let you have from that? That's because I have a special task for you. And this is just between the three of us. Not even Mr Greyback can know about this. Meet me at the north-east corner of the Crouch estate in Bishop's Stortford, Hertfordshire tonight unless you have orders from higher up. [ END WARDS. ]
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